Building Rapport vs. Establishing A Commonality

Hello and welcome to Debbie’s Daily Tips.

And today I’m going to answer a question: what is the difference between building rapport and establishing a commonality?

And it’s actually a question because they are drastically different, neither one is bad but they’re just so different. And I want to explain that and show you where the attempt to establish a commonality could really create an issue for you.

So let’s say that I walk into a seller’s home and I’ve never met them before and as they’re touring me around, l happen to notice that they are a golfer and so I say, “Oh, Mr. and Mrs. Seller, I noticed that you’re a golfer, you know I’m a golfer too. In fact, let me tell you about my golf game, and last week where I played and what my score was and my trophies,” and on and on and on.

See what happens when I’m meeting someone for the first time or maybe the first couple of times, and I’m working overtime to establish a commonality, they see through that. They often see that for exactly what it is, a sale’s person attempt to build rapport.

So instead of leaning on the crutch of establishing a commonality at that first meeting, instead, go to building rapport. And how you build rapport is you stop talking about you, you maintain eye contact, you mirror and match their rate of speech, you acknowledge and approve, you ask great questions all about them, the who, what, where, when, why and how, and you listen to their answers.

Now, there’s nothing wrong as you get to know them with establishing commonalities of discussing your hobbies and your interests in common. All I’m suggesting is that you don’t use that as your first and only go to when attempting to build rapport with a new prospect or customer.

Alright, thanks for joining me today, have a great day and I’ll talk to you next on the next Debbie’s Daily Tips.

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